What do you call two Latinos playing baseball one on one?
Short Jokes
What did the icicle say to the snow?
"Why do you have to be so soft?"
If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to kill myself, I'd be a millionaire.
What do you call a dinosaur that likes subtraction?
A galiminus.
If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?
Knock knock. Who’s there? Gary. Gary who? Gary a torch.
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What's breakdancing, twitching, and noisy?
A child with epilepsy.
Why did Jimmy throw his clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly.
I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.
How do you get a baby out of a blender?
With Doritos!
What happened to the alligator when he held a GPS?
He became a navigator.
What is a doll's favorite dog? A doll-matian.
Kids?
Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.
What does a clock do when he's still hungry?
He goes back "four" seconds!
They said time heals all wounds, well, I broke your watch.
I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible.
Do you know what my favorite time of day is?
6:30, hands down.
Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.