Short jokes
Me: I want to be a stand-up comedian.
Friend: You have to be able to stand up.
A vampire stalks you into a field of corn. The stakes have never been higher...
Joe Mama so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl!
"Get a life, dum dums!"
Says the fucking moron.
What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?
They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”
What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him having sex? "You're wheelie good at this!"
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
Isn't there a software company named after your dick?
Microsoft?
I saw some toilet paper rolls rolling in the wind.
So I called, "Toilet Papers Rolling In!"
Ctrl, Alt, Deletus, because of thine fetus.
What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
Predator 2.
Couy.
What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day?
"Deja moo!"
If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?
Write a different joke of onions and a dead baby.
Why do orphans love foster homes?
Because they actually have a home.
What do you call an army of autistic people?
Special forces!
All dumbs aren't blonde.
Orphans more like or fans!!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.