Short jokes
Do you know why the Royal family can no longer play Monopoly?
How do you think Princess Diana died?
...Too soon?
Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.
Why did the moderator of worstjokesever.com die?
He had a heart attack because he was a fat loser.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
Which one of Lord Arthur's knights invented the round table?
Sir Cumference.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
gae
Q: What do American beer and canoes have in common?
A: Fu@king close to water!
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
If a king farts, is it a noble gas?
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the wall and got unplugged.
What do an abortion and a baby have in common?
The mom doesn't want either of them.
Actually, it isn't a bear joke, but bear with me here...
The grapes in the supermarket are really raisin' the bars...
Why did the crumb cake isolate himself? He had a crumbling social life.
I was up all night because my neighbors were having sex.
*I was actually up all night watching.*
Your mom is so old, she turned to dust before Thanos snapped.