Short jokes
As a hobby, I started taking walks around the old clock tower.
It's a great way to pass the time.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
Two cows were hiding.
One said: "Moooo."
The other one said: "Shut up! We're hiding!"
What did Julius say when he saw a woman stealing an expensive chandelier?
“Guards! Seize her (Caesar)!”
What is a necrophiliac's favorite candy? A Hearsey's Kiss.
What was the computer's best pickup line?
Nice bits!
To master puns, you got to relish them first. That's how I must(ar)d it. Who knows, maybe you will ketchup to my level.
I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.
What do you call blue and orange at the bottom of a pool?
A baby with flat armbands!
A common question I get as a doctor is, do vaccines cause autism? Well!, I was vaccinated, so.....
You know I'm not too into black girls, but Kobe's daughter was smoking!
I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. 😂
What's the difference between tuna, a piano and glue?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
Your momma's so dumb, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
What's the difference between cancer and a Nazi? Cancer doesn't discriminate.
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
Why did the moderator of worstjokesever.com die?
He had a heart attack because he was a fat loser.
Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.
Do you know why the Royal family can no longer play Monopoly?
How do you think Princess Diana died?
...Too soon?
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.