Short jokes
What’s the difference between a mother and a fetus at an abortion office?
Only one of them is scared.
A midget walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says no.
The midget asks why. The bartender says, "You're a little drunk!"
What's the difference between a chocolate cake and a dead baby?
About 5000 calories.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They wanted someone to call "daddy."
I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:
If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?
Shoot.
I was going to make a joke about a piece of paper.
It's just too tear-able.
If she refuses to suck and threatens to bite, just knock her teeth out. Call it the “Bloody Gummer”.
Why is he ourple?
I’m not racist. I just have black guns.
Where is an elephant’s penis?
On their feet, because if you get trampled on, you’re fucked.
What do you call a two-dimensional owl? A Paper Towl!
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up.
What do you call a bus full of white people?
A TWINKiE!!!
What do you do when you get rid of prostate cancer?
Cell-ablate!
One time I ate a chair.
This whole page is pure trash. Fuck all of you.
What do you call a flying octopus?
An octocopter! 🚁
What did the chef on the Titanic scream as he tried to finish the dishes? "Oh no, the sink sank!"
Why are so many people mean to orphans?
They can’t cry to their parents.