Short jokes
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
Among Us players after saying "Self Report!" to the police officers who find a dead body in their basement.
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
Which one of Lord Arthur's knights invented the round table?
Sir Cumference.
gae
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
Why did Annie fall from the swing?
Because she had no hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Annie.
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
Q: What do American beer and canoes have in common?
A: Fu@king close to water!
If a king farts, is it a noble gas?
People are like trees...
They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.
The grapes in the supermarket are really raisin' the bars...
My Japanese friend told me a Pearl Harbor joke. I told him he bombed it.
I was up all night because my neighbors were having sex.
*I was actually up all night watching.*
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
What do an abortion and a baby have in common?
The mom doesn't want either of them.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the wall and got unplugged.