Short jokes
Would you watch a tree grow? Or a knee grow?
Look, Bono is a great guy, but shopping with him is a pain, because he still hasn't found what he is looking for.
Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"
if you play minecraft: your dog is still waiting for you in the world you made along time ago.
You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.
How do our brains remember that we forgot something, but we can't remember what that thing was?
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
Are you a mental hospital? Cause I need to be in you.
What do strippers and butter have in common?
Both spread for bread.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
What is better to have, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you! 😫
What’s the difference between women and cars?
At least cars retain some of their value after getting wrecked.
Why should you never make height jokes about dwarfs?
It goes right over their head.
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store. I told him, “I don’t think they have what you’re looking for, sir.”
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense.
They have to come out of the closet sometime.
What’s better than Stephen Hawking?
Stephen walking.
What’s the difference between chocolate and people?
You can’t buy people nowadays.
What do you call five Black people having sex?
Threesome.
"Stupidity isn’t a crime, so you’re free to go."