Short jokes

Short jokes

Diary

My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.

Orphan

I saw an orphan fall in the street crying, so I ran up to him and said, "Are you okay? Where are your parents?"

Orphanage

An orphanage is like a horse rescue. You rescue them, rehabilitate them, then sell them for as much as possible.

Problem

When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."

Pirate

Why didn't the pirate want to play cards?

Because he was standing on the deck!

Cat

Where does a French cat live?

- In Purr-is

OR

- In the Catacombs

OR

- In a chat-eau.

Crowbar

My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!

It's not my birthday, but a scary-looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house.

Beer

What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?

A: Beers for Queers.

Butter

Did you hear the gossip about butter? Never mind, I butter not spread it...

Pirate

Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?

Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?