Short jokes
On Halloween you better hide your candy, or else there will be a fella named Big Dick Randy.
What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?
Helen Killer.
A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
I met an African girl the other night, we spoke for hours.
We just clicked.
Q: What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
A: One has hope in her soul and one has soap in her hole.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought someone else was ugly, but then I saw you.
I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.
Why is Penaldo's favorite club Real Mallorca?
Because it reminds him of Kathryn Mallorca🥵
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
It only takes 4 inches to please a woman.
And it doesn’t matter if it’s credit or debit.
My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?
My dick.
What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?
Van Halen's "Jump."
What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?
They are both legless.
Why do dwarfs do drugs?
To get high.
Cop: "I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia."
Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"
"A llahu Aks into a bar..."
And it blows up!
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.