Short jokes
What's the difference between the righteous and a sinner?
You decide.
Abortions = yeetis of the fetus.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
Why can't orphans be gay? Because then they would be home-osexual.
What did they find in Jeffery Dahmer's apartment?
Jack in a box.
What did the female rapist say at her hearing?
"Well that boy's dick was inside me and you know what you metoo people say, 'my body my choice.'"
The "S" in Putin stands for smart.
What is an orphanage's favorite Roblox game?
"Adopt Me."
What do you call a dinosaur that loves sucking dino dick?
Sucks-alota-cocka-sorass.
Why do Swedish warships have barcodes on them?
So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
Why do priests perform baptisms? So they can see children wet.
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.
What do you call a woman who aborted her quadruplets? A graveyard.
Your mama is so fat that she took a picture at Christmas, and it's still downloading.
Roses are red, violets are blue, my mom and dad died, next you'll be gone too.
Why does a leaf fall faster than an emo kid? Because the emo hangs itself.
Your forehead goes back to when Burger King was Burger Prince.
All zodiac signs have a signature hairstyle except for cancer. :)
Me- *crying in the shower*
Also me- *why is my toaster in here?*
Me: "Oh man, things are really happening for me! I have so much to do!"
Depression: "Lie in bed."