Why did the M&M go to school? It wanted to be a Smartie.
your breath is so hot it mad the chicgo fire.
A guy bought a AMG and crashed it, now he knows how the mercedes BENZ.
Velcro is such a rip-off
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools Pranks
A. Pranken stein
What happened when the teacher tied all the students shoe lases together?
They took a class trip.
How do you scare a bee?
BooBee
I like playing with Yoyos, because at least they always comeback
A seal walks into a club
AIDS
[god creating a jellyfish] God: how about an evil bag
Arsenal
when a donkey digs a tunnel it is called a burro
I went scuba diving last year. It was fun but at the end I ran out of oxygen. It was a breathtaking experience.
What do you call a person who's afraid of Santa? Klaustrophobic
Q: why did the family want to move out while the neighbors were playing tennis?
A: because they were a racquet!
Why can't bugs drive... because they don't have a LICE-ens... BA-DUM CHHH!
I had amnesia once...maybe twice.
What do people that can only use half there face and wankers have in common. They have both had a few strokes
You want a joke. My entire existence.