Q: What did the cannibal say to the leper?
A: You gonna eat that?
Short Jokes
Helen Keller fell down a well. She screamed and screamed until she was blue in the hands.
What do you call someone who hates rape jokes? An ugly feminist that couldn't get a cock in her mouth.
Kenny was into incest until his mom died.
Now he's into necrophilia.
Dear math,
Please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.
Thanks.
How do you confuse a blonde? Put it in a circle and tell it to sit in the corner.
My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
How did the USA beat Japan in rapping?
By dropping two of the biggest roasts.
Why did the rape victim think it was Christmas?
Because her clothes were torn off like wrapping paper.
What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?
They both hang from trees.
Can all the hot, depressed, suicidal guys just text me so we can meet up and cry together about how depressed we are. For real.
Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?
Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.
What's the difference between Bird flu and swine flu?
For one you get tweetment, for the other you get oinkment.
What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."
What's the difference between my dad and my stepdad?
My stepdad beat my ass before he left.
A Mexican boy said, "I can't do this." Then a guy says, "You can do it, we are Mexican, not Mexicant."
Are you a Samsung Galaxy Note 7? Because I want to explode in you!
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person? "What's bringing you down?"
A girl asks her Asian boyfriend if he wants to eat her pussy. He asks her why she is taking off her clothes, instead of cooking her cat.
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
