Short jokes
Guess Stephen's batteries died.
My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She's got my sister's eyes.
Stephen was a great person, and he will be greatly missed, but I enjoy these jokes too much to not stop.
Woah, nice cock.
Bully... you're such an asshole. Me... Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you won’t like it as an adult.
I guess Hitler was forced to have vegetables when he was younger.
How did the hipster drown?
He ice-skated before it was cool.
How do you know when your wife is cheating on you?
She comes home with sparkles on her face.
I was going to make a chemistry joke. But it looks like I won’t get a reaction :)
What's the most common thing between Hitler and an emo?
Hitler knows when to kill himself!
Why can't Juice Wrld play Black Ops II?
Because he can't handle 6 perks.
Doctor: You don't have long to live. 10...
Patient: Ten what? Ten years, ten months?
Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
Is it normal my emo cousin's hobby is tying himself to train tracks?
How to get quick cash:
Step 1: Kill a child's parents.
Step 2: Do foster care for them.
Step 3: Get paid for doing foster care.
I used to be into necrophilia. Until that rotten cunt split on me...
What's the most unrealistic part of Harry Potter?
A ginger with friends.
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
A chicken tender.
How do you name an Asian child?
Ring the doorbell.
Yo mamma so stupid, she starved to death in a grocery store.
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?
steamed vegetables.