Short jokes
What's the difference between an elephant and a feminist?
The feminist is overweight.
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
I identify as kilometers per second because I want to km/s.
Are you a Samsung Galaxy Note 7? Because I want to explode in you!
What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."
Hairy vagina is like sweets with the wrapper on. You don't like it, but you still eat it.
"I wasn't that drunk yesterday."
"Oh boy, you took the shower head in your arms and told it to stop crying."
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person? "What's bringing you down?"
I wish my lawn was emo, because then it would cut itself.
What do you call a funny cow?
A cowmedian.
A nun walked into a bar with her clothes on inside out. The bartender asked her about it, and she replied, "It's a bad habit."
A girl asks her Asian boyfriend if he wants to eat her pussy. He asks her why she is taking off her clothes, instead of cooking her cat.
What did one piece of toilet paper say to the other? "I feel really wiped."
What did the Chinese family name their retarded kid? Something Wong.
What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of salad?
A chicken sees a salad (chicken Caesar salad).
Guess Stephen's batteries died.
My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She's got my sister's eyes.
Stephen was a great person, and he will be greatly missed, but I enjoy these jokes too much to not stop.
Woah, nice cock.
How did the USA beat Japan in rapping?
By dropping two of the biggest roasts.