Short jokes
Your mom is emo, Deacon.
Feed the hungry with the hungry. It solves world hunger and overpopulation at once!
You're so ugly that I choked and died.
Quote from Seth no.1: "I would have fought back, but she was seven."
"hipede hop hiped d the twin towers will be gone tomoreo at 8:43"
When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.
“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”
Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!
Why are women like diapers?
They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.
When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
Deja Vu.
What's the difference between a terrorist training camp and an orphanage?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
Mbu some guys look financially stable until you start dating them... Mbu wait I see how this week goes...🤔
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
What was the winning play at the leper football game? A hand off up the middle.
What's the difference between a Baptist and a rapist? The priests.
What do you call a priest meeting his illegal children?
A holy CUMmunion.
Yo momma so fat, when she said, "Order in the court," she really meant burgers and fries.
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
A man walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia.
The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you!"
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Anything they can't catch you.