Short jokes
What time do butts get up? At the crack of dawn!!!
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side!
A girl asks her Asian boyfriend if he wants to eat her pussy. He asks her why she is taking off her clothes, instead of cooking her cat.
What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
Cha Ching.
Why did potassium draw a tear that would result in him crying?
Because all of his friends argon.
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, "Honey put down the knife, we were only talking about getting a divorce."
Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?
Johnny was deaf.
Dream: Speedruns Minecraft.
Technoblade: Speedruns Life.
What do you call your Indian best friend who is the ABSOLUTE BEST at cunnilingus? A Curry Muncher.
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
Some say Stephen Hawking was a genius, but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
Your forehead is so big and shiny it looks like a solar field.
How does the bunny keep his fur neat?
With a hare brush.
So Santa fell down the chimney, but it was a lit chimney...his name's no longer Santa. It's Crisp Cringle. Pls send help :)
Where are you not allowed to go trick or treating as a ghost?
Harlem, New York.
Died and came back a cowboy, I call that reintarnation.
How did the USA beat Japan in rapping?
By dropping two of the biggest roasts.
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What is the most difficult day in the ghetto?
Father's Day.
What feature does an orphan's phone not have?
A home button.