Short jokes
Roses are red.
My soul is black.
I am never getting my dad back.
What's the one thing me and the New Year's ball have in common?
It's not gonna be the only thing falling 50 stories this New Year's.
What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.
What kind of dreams do hotels have?
Suite dreams.
What’s the difference between a child and a suicider?
One stays quiet forever...
I was gonna do a school shooter joke, but it was aimed at younger audiences.
Two pedophiles talking to each other:
"Do you got two fives for one ten?"
They should add an eleventh commandment to the Bible:
Thou shalt not f... altar boys.
One man's trash is another man's treasure... Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you're adopted.
What do you call a high school student?
Alone and depressed.
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.
The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.
All jokes are funny with the correct delivery. Except for abortion jokes, there is no delivery.
Why do prostitutes love servicing zombies? They always leave a tip.
Technically, suicide is murder, and murder is illegal, so if I kill myself, my body should go to jail.
Guys, my sister's pregnant!
I'm finally a dad!
Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.
Boy: Knock knock.
Girl: ...Who's there?
Boy: Not your parents!
I have a fish that can breakdance!
Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
(sorry in advance this joke is brutal)
What has 12 heads and 24 eyes?
The bin at the back of the abortion clinic.
What do you do when you see a sad orphan?
Nothing, let them wait for their parents.