Short jokes
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?
They never get old.
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
My grandfather never threw anything away, bless him. He died in the war holding on to a hand grenade.
Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.
The person: "Only the last thing left to hang!"
He grabs a noose.
Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Because they are parental guidance.
My neck, my back, my crippling anxiety attacks.
These jokes are fun for the whole family to enjoy.
I'm a fast reader, I can go through 20 stories in a few seconds.
What song do orphans hate the most? "We are family."
What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The fridge don't fart when you take your meat out.
What is 6.9?
A beautiful thing ruined by a period.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
Must be more than 13, because my basement is still dark.
Person: Where do I commit suicide?
Dog: Roof.
Person: Good idea.
What were the terrorist of 9/11 thinking?
We can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we'll have to go through it.
I like my humor like my people. Well done.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he's hooked up to? The computer runs.
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
Statistics show that 1 in 3 people live next to a pedophile. However, I think that's a lie because I just live next to 2 stunning 8-year-olds.
Never tell an orphan about a family matter; they wouldn't understand.