Short jokes

Why do squirrels love dick?

Because it produces nut.

Orphans are cool.

You: What do you call a door knob without the lock?

Me: I don't know.

You: Are you sure?

Me: I don't know.

You: Okay.

Little Jonny, what you like airplane? How? Because you fly fast and jump high.

Yo momma's so ugly Thanos had to snap twice.

I was going to invite your friends to your birthday, but they were all extinct.

You thought his puns were bad, wait till you sea mine!

If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.

I see you.

Hey guys, it's Gwen, and I want to say that I'm deleting my account regarding a comment made on my last post :(

Iceberg: You may know me.

Titanic: You are a sucker.

Iceberg: You hit me.

Titanic: Moron.

Iceberg: Waaaaaaaaaa!

Titanic: I don’t give a shit.

I need to speak to Water Sharky.

If Uranus was a dick, then why do they make Uranus?

I declare war on Gwen!

Why was the fanny flat?

So it can flop about.

Why did the sheep die? Cos he wasn’t pretty enough.

A nut told me to eat him, so I did, but something weird happened. I turned into a nut, and when I poop, there were eggs there.

Have you heard of dideys?

Dideys balls fit in your mouth.

Mario (DYM 150).

What's a psych ward worker's favorite incense?

Insurance fraud.