Short jokes
I cut my dick. It is all right now, and half the size but makes for excellent breakfast.
Should I burn heaven?
What do my cock and money have in common?
Your mom.
Your mama was so fat that she sunk the Titanic!
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
What do you call a car on the side of the road, lit up and ablaze?
Paul Walker's death.
That's why your grandma 6 ft deep, feet!
Why can't Americans play chess? Because they lost their 2 towers.
Why are Americans bad at Clash Royale? Because they lost their 2 towers.
You can't send an Indian to walk a corner. The only corner they will get to is 7-11.
I killed a homeless dude, now she's at the funeral home. 😭💔
Where’s the English Channel?
Johnny: “I don’t know. My television doesn’t pick it up.”
Slay.
"Can we do 69?"
"How about we do 9/11 since we will crash together?"
Never mind if I told you, it would go straight through your head.
"Beast Boy Four"
It's still depression, by the way.
What's long, hard, and bloody?
The Boston Marathon.
"So what, ah, my G?"
Jackhammer McQueerson
Yo mamma sucks!
I kicked my leg into my dad's balls in 1999.