Short jokes
Clear all your debts with one easy payment. Buy a shotgun and blow your head off.
What happened when 800 hares got loose in the center of town?
The cops had to comb through the area.
What protects clowns from the sun?
A bozone layer.
Be careful, because I heard that NASA is going to send a rover to Uranus.
Only a city council committee would create this mistake.
Put a fucking playground next to a shitty sewer!
What is the worst thing about licking a bald fanny?
Putting the nappy on afterwards.
Everyone, Alya is okay!!!!!!!!!! She got up, she can walk, and she can talk regular!!!!
What’s red, 11 inches, and makes my girlfriend cry when I slap her with it?
Her miscarriage.
Yo mama so fat, she's bigger than the universe itself!
Bully: Your fat.
Me: Fat is something to fix, but your face isn't.
Yo momma's so fat that she plays pool with planets.
How did the United States become a country? It broke all of its states.
A guy walks into a bar with a 44 magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The guy behind the bar says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets!"
SHUT UP EVERYBODY!
Uranus is cold.
What does NASA stand for? Nobody Asked, Someone Answered.
What is the difference between you and me? I have parents and yours left...
Yo Mamma's so ugly, she made One Direction turn into the other direction!
Nerverack.
Desmend: FLY
Draco: FLY
Me: DIE