Short jokes
I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.
It didn't work.
Friend: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Friend: Your life.
Me: Ahhh, I wish!
*jumps off building*
I was Gandalf the Grey.
But now, after just three washes...
What did the suicidal leprechaun say?
"Irish I was dead."
What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"
Your mom gay, Evan.
Mom hot.
Why did the Titanic cross the road?
What’s the difference between hungry and horny?
Where you put the cucumber 🥒
Orphans can't call their parents if they get hurt! Sorry.🩹
But he could only get 1 trade.
Damn, didn't know this site was about Harry Pot-
Your bus is so short... the wheels touch.
It's not a joke.
Why shouldn’t you play basketball with a pig?
Because he’s a ball hog.
What do the initials ACLU stand for?
🤔
American Communist Lawyers Union.
The school shooter encounters the emo kid. He reaches for his gun, but the emo kid disappears. He then finds that his gun is not on him.
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
Yo son so excellent, he gone to a Rubik’s cube competition who competed against his daddy.
What song do you play at a emo kid's funeral?
House of Pain—"Jump Around."
Why does the Queen play poker on the toilet?
Because she always gets a Royal flush!