Short jokes
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
My bully: Your face is ugly.
Me: Yeah well your mom is so fat she broke the stairway to heaven.
My bully: :(
I am deciding to do songs on this app... so I am a type songs. If you want a specific song typed I will type just comment!
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Why are tomatoes green? Because they rot, like your mum.
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
People tell me to be nice to orphans, so I say, "What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?"
Why do you play Call of Duty?
I actually don't know.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
A man walks into a bar and orders a stiff drink. I gave him a glass of ice.
Hi, I'm new to this website, please follow.
What do you say to a foot that got beaten at everything?
De-feeted (Defeated)
What's the fastest way to Shepherd's Bush?
Up Shepherd's leg.
What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.
Your nose is so big that Apple had to make a custom iPhone that unlocks using Nose ID.
I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.
Your hairline is like Spiderman: far from forehead.
Bro used the quadratic formula to calculate the velocity of your -234 going down hairline.
I wish the grass in my backyard was emo.
So it can cut itself.
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Kids won't eat the broccoli.