Short jokes
Why am I naughty?
Because I want to be....
What do you get when a topless blonde rubs sun tanning oil on a topless brunette?
Your camera.
I told a joke at a funeral, but no one laughed. One mf was ded though💀.
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
ISI?
When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.
Turns out, I'm just a burden.
The dear God created the man.
Then he created woman.
When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.
What does an emo kid and pizza have in common?...... The pizza doesn’t cut itself.
Your forehead is so big it blocked my phone service!
What is a mouse's favorite movie?
"Sharpay's Fabu-mouse Adventure!"
Bitch!
Me and rose bushes have something in common: mangled, can hurt, red, and people only like one part.
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
My Premier is so fat she has her own gravitational pull.
What did the piggy bank say to his piggy friend?
"Ain't you got no cents?"
Piggy: "Actually, no. Just pork."
Roses are red, I have no money, I want to be dominated by a goth mommy.
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?
The fish can swim.
What does a ripped jacket and a golfer have in common?
They both have a hole in one.
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.