Short jokes
Why did the orphan scream "wolf"? Because people actually came back.
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
The coach yelled at me when I stole home. I ran home with the base and asked him where to put it.
If I fuck you harder, you have to scream "daddy," but what happens when you cum?
Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.
That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:
Stroke victims are my heroes.
My favorite is Louis C.K.
Are you Roblox? 'Cuz I wanna play ya all day.
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.
What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?
The slash and burn tactic.
Your mom is emo, Deacon.
One time Uma Thurman was Poison Ivy; she was weird in that, except for her punny jokes.
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
Because they're all about those DENTAL GRILLS!
Me rn: "Yo yo yo, for pre-K I went to K.I.S.S. a school."
My friend: "What is K.I.S.M.A.?"
Me: "K.I.S.M.A. balls!"
Dads are boomerangs, I hope.
My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was Spanish for blowjob.
When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.
Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.
Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.
Years later:
Dad still did not come back.
What do you call someone with notorious special needs and an extra chromosome?
The double trouble.
What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?
Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.