Short jokes
Life is better without my dad annoying me (him smacking me, screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more).
What did the Twin Towers say when they saw the airplane?
Batter up!
My Son: "Mummy, why is my name Thomas?"
Me: "Because the night you were conceived, I had a train run on me."
No, no, no, no. Spot the intruder.
There's no one.
Can bees fly in the rain?
Not if they don't have their yellow jackets!
Looks like McSkillet McKilledIt.
So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD
We forge the chains we wear in life.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ligma.
Ligma who?
Ligma balls.
Your mamma's so ugly, even the toaster wouldn't get in the bathtub with her.
I used to be a man in a woman’s body. And then I was born.
Kobe: "Don't crash!"
Helicopter: *Crashes*
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging.
There's one shop orphans can't go to, but what is it?
Home Depot.
Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.
What does the chicken say when he didn't understand something?
"What hap-HENd?"
Why do orphans not tell when they get hit?
Because who are they gonna tell, their mom?
What's a rapper's favorite animal?
RHYMENOCEROS!
Where do orphans shop? Home Depot.