Short jokes
Why did the FBI get a foster family for an orphan?
So he could be in a lovely family before death.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
A man with a drum.
"Well, tell him to beat it!"
I was watching the news and heard a segment about a blind hooker who got stabbed 40 times.
At least she didn't see it coming.
Snort poo poo.
What has two names and one big home?
A person.
What do you call my brother in the water?
"Tsunami."
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
Ice cold coffee? Cool beans!
where do suicide bombers go when they die? everywhere!
What’s Steven Hawking's fav[orite] food?
WiFi chips or his shoulder?
Why was the pregnant cow mad all the time? It wasn’t in for the moo-d.
What do you call a group of letters that like to dance but make you want to poop?
A vowel movement.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your mom's house.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Your new father!
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
Qualification Check:
Single
Taken
Friended ✔
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Akeld." "Akeld who?" "Assfeild!"
Bully says, "You are DISGUSTING!!!!!!"
The girl says, "Just like your face."
The cop that is on a 12 o'clock shift says, "Hands up!"
What's the difference between a bad joke and an actually bad joke?
An actually bad joke is not funny, like this one!
It looks like your dad is not the only one missing.