Short jokes
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?
They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.
What do you call cringe?
You.
Why are babies called bundles of joy?
When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.
Your mom is fat, oh yeah, oh yeah, uh, uhhh.
The Stephen Hawking space telescope will be launched next year. Apparently, it will have four wheels and run off Windows 7.
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
What kind of Panera Bread do pencils use?
Panera Lead.
I saw a guy crossing a street once. The light was red.
Why should you always be friends with an emo kid?
They always hang around.
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
I said to the fish, "I have dam."
2+2=7
Why do emos suck at playing tic-tac-toe on their wrists?
Because when they win, they lose.
Why did Steward die in the toilet?
He saw his Undercut in the mirror.
What's a suicidal person's favorite game?
Hangman.
1 minute silence for those who still think thoughts can't kill you.
Leukophobic people don’t have sex. Leukophobia is the fear of white.
Q: What is found deep inside of us, and the more we express our love for each other the more it spreads throughout the world?
A: Covid.
Why can't an orphan make a YouTube channel?
'Cause they can't make it family friendly.
I left my boots on in the river, and I drowned.