Short jokes
Two Chinese men walk into a bar.
"Owwwwwwwwwww," they say instead of "ouch."
Oil is soooooooo soooooooo cute 😍 ☺ 💓 💕 💖 ✨ 😍
I can't help it. Images look crazy but oil is soooooo cute!
What’s the only reason Emos drink?
To get hungover.
What's Pokémon #539 (Sawk)?
Sawk on deez nuts!
You're a copycat from Ballarat You smell like a rat, you wear a hat and you are shaped like a baseball bat.
Song by John Rizk
I wrote a song about a tortilla yesterday, but it’s actually more of a rap.
How are the faster readers in the world?
9/11 victims, they read 80 stories in 10 seconds.
Did you hear about the nurse who couldn’t swim?
She ended up under the doc[tor].
One day a son and his grandad were smoking.
Too bad only the sun was smoking. :)
Your momma's so fat, she farted in bed and blew the covers off.
Yo mama so fat that every time she takes a swim, the Arctic sinks by a mile!
At school I am always called emo.
Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.
Your hairline is so long that when I put it on email, it didn't send, which is ETHAN BRIDEWATER.
Teacher: Anyone missing?
Orphan: My parents.
Teacher: Something that is real, kid.
Orphan: My family.
Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!
My pits are hairy, but my I can carry.
"Lock him up, you know, Trump!"
Fred says, "Have you heard the rumor about butter?"
Bob says, "Umm no."
Fred then says, "Ah, okay then I won't spread it."
You are so hairy, you starred in Donkey Kong before!
I hate salmonella.
It is such a pain in the butt.
Cousin: Hahaha, I am their biological parent.
Kid: So what? At least they love me more.