Short jokes
What's the difference between a noodle and a scaboodle fladooodle?
Him: I work with animals all day.
Her: Awwww what do you do?
Him: I'm a pornstar.
I fucked the shit outta of my friend's mom with my 8 inch dick (Adrian). PS. Sorry, Adrian!
What did the chicken say to the turkey?
Nothing, he chickened out!
I was in a terrorist a famous terrorist group. No, not the Taliban. We called ourselves the Talabam.
I love the word legs.
Wanna help me spread the word?
I want a bigger couch.
Why? You're going to be in the kitchen most of the time anyway.
My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.
If you swallow gum, it will make your poop bouncy.
What’s the difference between a whale and Lizzo?
Absolutely nothing.
What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?
Predator.
How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.
vgvgvgh.
Your hairline is so bad even Ariana Grande stopped singing because of it.
Say "Uranus" but take out the "ur."
I love Fortnite because I touched grass for the first time and also I love Chung Lei.
You're so fat when you walk into the mall, you *are* the mall.
Your hairline receded just like your father did years ago.
Why do people consume "Laxatives"?
Answer: So that they can take a "Shit", STUPID!
What’s the difference between a fetus and a woman?
A fetus has more rights.