Short jokes

Short Jokes

Tinder

On my Tinder profile, I said, "I prefer quality over quantity." I just thought it sounded nicer than saying "no fat birds."

Nut

What did the mama nut say to her son?

“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”

Nut

Which nut is the best at playing tag?

Catch-yous, aka cashews.

Nut

What do you call a nut with a hairy upper lip?

A mustach-io!

Mom

Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.

Ritual

As a kid, I used to eat a sour herb from a certain spot near a rock.

Now I pee on it, just following the ritual of Africa.

Accident

My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!

People

Please stop hurting people's feelings, or they'll hang around the house.

Pope

The Pope drives around in a glass box, or as I like to call him, a sniper's dream.

Wheelchair

What does a kid do when he's bored and he's sitting? He puts wheels on the chair and makes it a wheelchair.

Love

Gwen, please just come back. I love you and I miss you so much!

Gratitude

Gwen, are you dead????? If not, I am Alya. Thanks for always standing up for me!!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger

*Chatting with a stranger on the internet*

Me: Hi, how are you?

A stranger: I'm fine, hbu?

Me: I'm good. 🤷‍♂️

Pic

If you want to see what I look like, then pics will be coming soon!

But freshfry, how are you!

Oh, and this is Cassie, aka princess shortie!