Short jokes

Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.

You pooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Where is the best place to eat tacos?

In the Gulp of Mexico.

Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.

I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.

Okay, so I have a dairy and sugar allergy, and if I eat it, I get REALLY CONSTIPATED, so this is me when I’m constipated ᕙ(⇀‸↼‵‵)ᕗ lol.

Yo mama is so fat, she jumped on a trampoline and she broke it.

Hey girl, are you a diamond pick?

'Cause I'm as hard as obsidian.

What do you call it when Panera Bread is running away?

Panera fled.

What do you call a person who measures air? Airometer.

You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.

Bro, you look like you got your hair from the Roblox avatar shop.

Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?

It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.

This joke is so bad I don't even know what I wrote at this point.

Goku solos.

John Cena.

What's green and smells like pork?

Kermit's fingers!

My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.

Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.

Friends = your power level.

Emo kid = power level: 0000.

Don’t blame Bush; he is white. It couldn’t have been him.

Shup up, transparent hairline. Look like you got splashed by some clear soap.