Short jokes
Why didn't R. Kelly go to Germany to fuck teens? The legal age there is 14...Like bro hop on a plane and fuck a 14 year old hooker!
Simpsons.
Meet the Simpsons.
They're the greatest modern family.
From the town of Springfield.
They're a page right out of history.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?
They never had parents to protect them from it.
Your forehead is so big it can't even fit in the garage!
Why did Stephen Hawking die? Because he's slightly ginger.
What is red, white, and blue all over?
A dead cop.
My bully: Your face is ugly.
Me: Yeah well your mom is so fat she broke the stairway to heaven.
My bully: :(
"What’s your name?"
"Am erica."
"No, I asked for your name, not your country."
What do you call an unemployed Rastafarian?
Jah Bless.
Friend, you're bold and fat.
Me: Bro, go to the bathroom and look at the mirror. You will probably break it.
Why did everyone dislike Little Johnny at school?
'Cause he pierced everyone's livers with a .357 magnum.
Why did they call it "Aqua Claudia"?
Because it carried water, and another word for water is aqua. Duh!
Why use Heathrow when we have your forehead?
Why did the orphan not get service at the restaurant?
Because it was a family restaurant!
Why do Asians abandon their children?
They're bad at math.
Your hairline jokes are so bad that they make me want to rip all my hair out.
"Clap clap clap that ass, bitch, shake that cameltoe, let them see them pussy lips!"
What games do orphans hate?
Bingo.
Your hairline is so ugly, even Dora the Explorer can’t even do it.