Short jokes
What is the difference between Chinese and Japanese?
Some smile, others beam.
Stephen Hawking never used a condom. He used a firewall.
Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?
A: Eat my dust.
"Self harm jokes aren't that deep."
What did Joe Biden say to the dog? I'm gonna molest you.
A child's parents once lived in Chicago.
I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.
What’s the worst part about a dead prostitute?
You end up doing all the work.
So I walked into my bathroom to clean some stuff, and no one ever told me you can't put phones in the bathtub!
Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?
Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. 💀😈
Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?
She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.
Have you heard the word of the day? It’s "legs".
Now, let’s go back to my place and I can spread them.
What do you call an @EB with no ears?
An Explain B.
What the sigma?
Your mom is so ugly that she made a mirror shatter.
Your mom is so ugly that she uses Snapchat filters to make her pretty.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
......
Do you think when the Secret Service heard the gunshot they were like, "Donald Duck"?
Why did the terrorist masturbate and smoke weed on the plane?
He was told to high-jack it.
What bird is good at gaming? A game bird.
Animals are just... so hot!