Short jokes
I was walking to the park and a mystery killer came and shot me.
370HSSV 0773H wait, you're reading it upside down.
My friend and I were playing Poker... And my friend also beat me with Jackass.
Two kids were beating up a kid in an alley, so I stepped in to help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
I'm in school lol.
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
In Home Alone, if the kid was an orphan, it would just be called "Alone."
Chicken
Your mom is so fat, they asked if she was a sumo wrestler.
Teacher: Everyone, tomorrow is bring your mom to school day.
Me: Sorry but my mom's not gonna make it.
Teacher: Why?
Me: I'm an orphan, bitch.
What does a Russian do for entertainment?
A nuclear world fair.
Why did the chicken go to the restaurant?
To eat chicken!
What are two things you could call a fart?
"Gas from the ass" or "Odor from the motor!"
Hi meccool.
What did the mouse say after its bath?
"I feel squeaky clean!"
Why did the farmer's wife chase the chickens out of the yard?
'Cause they were using fowl language!
Hey there, wanna buy some chromosomes?
What sound do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?
Meow.
What is an owl that wears armor?
Prince, do you love that girl Gwen more than me? Remember when you were at my house?
How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.