Short jokes
When Hitler killed himself, he shot himself twice. The first one was Operation Barbarossa, and the second one was his death.
Boy, your forehead so big, I can make a launchpad on that shit!
When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomach?
When you see your mom.
Me: bruh
Her: Are you serious right now bro?
Me: Yeah no shit.
Her: *slaps me*
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
What do you call a Muslim bee?
Habibee.
I wanna take drowning lessons, but I can't find more than one session.
I’m a paki nonse.
Me: Hey! Look at my drawing of deez!
My babysitter: Very nice! But, uh, what’s deez?
Me: (¬‿¬)
What do a mole and an eagle have in common?
They live underground, except for the eagle. Lol.
What is the difference between interstate and intercourse?
Your eyebrows run away like your dad.
Your eyebrows turned into little butterflies and flew away!
Even Captain Cook couldn't discover your forehead.
If I measured your forehead, it would be 100,000,000,000,000,000 miles long.
If you measured your hairline with a protractor, it would show 90 degrees.
Had to go to the barbers just to get your hairline sorted.
If your hairline was a river, it would meander left, right, and backwards.
I had to take the underground just to get from your forehead to your hairline, they're so far apart!!!