Short jokes

Short jokes

Funeral

At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.

Matrix

What's white but not black, and red all over?

J. K. Rowling after attending the world premiere of the next Matrix movie.

Monster

A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.

Corpse

What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?

Cow

What do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?

A: Cowacat

B: Mooore

C: Cowacatfood

Batman

What does Batman have that Superman doesn't?

The ability to visit his biological parents' grave.

Hairline

Your hairline and your forehead must have a lot in common because they go waaaaaaaayyy back!

Forehead

Your forehead is so big that it's a 20 dollar taxi ride from your eyebrow to your hairline.