Short jokes
What did the lampshade say to the light bulb?
You brighten my day.
My friend tried to sleep on napkins.
I guess that's why they're called NAP-kins.
I broke the sink yesterday; the handle just blew right off! My dad was so mad, he blew his stack!
Stand? Wait. No.
What was Stephen Hawking's last message before he died: "Server shutting down."
Last night I slipped on a banana.
My friend said it was a-peeling!
Why did 10 kill itself?
Because it was between 9/11.
Why did the dog cross the road?
It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
I am not that good at making ice jokes, but it will suffice.
I was to go to space camp, but then I realized I had no space to learn.
Why was the washing machine laughing?
It was taking the piss out of the knickers!
mnvsdvmsdnva.
What's the difference between 20 and 14?
9 to 10 years.
Your AMAMA.
I don't usually like to tell 9/11 jokes for two reasons: they're morally wrong, and they tend to crash and burn.
I searched up hornets and then said that it will leave a sting.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
🎉🎇🎊🎆🎈
My friend told me I should be a stand up comedian but... I prefer sitting.
I met a drum circle once, they were a huge hit!