Short jokes

Kid in 2021: I'm goated at hide and seek.

Anne Frank: I am the hide and seek champion of the world.

If I tell Stephen about these jokes, what is he gonna do? Chase after me? He better run fast!

P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?

P2: I don't know.

P1: Wow, you sick fuck!

Mommy is a YouTuber, she can never spend time with me.

Mommy sits on my potty and sings a song about poop.

Yo mama so dumb, when she looked at the light, she said, "Why is the sun so close to me?"

"The size doesn’t matter" - Ana from Frozen.

If a simp is staring at you, cover your mouth (they'll stop looking).

Why do crack heads like to do it doggy style?

So one can peep out window and one can peep on floor.

What would the main character from Martin Scorsese's Taxi Driver be named if he was a Mexican?

Travis Spick-le.

What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?

"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"

I want to make another joke about Josef Vasicek, but I think if I make the NHL, I'll die in an airplane crash, so I won't risk it again.

What do you call someone who is in an airplane crash who was a 2006 Stanley Cup champion with the Carolina Hurricanes?

Josef Vasicek.

Build your ex a fire, and they're warm for a day.

Set your ex on fire and hide the smile/evidence.

Why did Ronald McDonald go to KFC to destroy them?

One tonsil said to the other tonsil, “We must be in San Juan Capistrano, here comes another swallow.”

Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?

The damages are severe.

Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."

Orphan: Starts crying.

Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.

Why was Josef Vasicek a Stanley Cup champion in 2006?

Because you know who was jealous and he went down in 2020.