What happens when you eat salmon with Nutella?
You get salmonella.
Short Jokes
Q: Why can't skeletons go to the dance?
A: He doesn't have the guts for it.
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
Me, holding a baby: "Oh my God, it's so cute!"
Also me: "Throw it."
Why did the biology teacher break up with the physics teacher?
Because there was no chemistry...
MY NAME IS JEFFFFFFFF!
I'm dead inside.
My diet:
Make all of my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look...
Corn flake.
What did the Orphan say when he Googled Orphan jokes?
I would say these jokes hit home, but there is no home to hit.
Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?
At a second-hand store.
How many degreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees does Billy Corgan have?
1979.
What's the difference to a kamikaze and bin Ladin?
Bin Ladin survived when he went into a building. I have aids.
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
What do you call a man shopping? A half-grown carton of cheese.
Imagine being named Colby and you burn yourself.
I called my dog 5 miles.
Today, I fawn over my miles.
How did the toilet react when it received a gift?
That was so pot full (thoughtful)!
The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"
