Short jokes
Rape jokes aren't funny.
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.
What do you get when you cross an octopus with a Mexican?
I don't know, but man can it pick lettuce.
When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.
Stop the cap.
Wanna know the last words of the south tower?
"HAHA LOOK AT YOU! IMAGINE BEING HIT YOU L BOZO!"
I told a girl she was cute, and she said, "Aw, tysm."
How does she know I have that?
Uwuuuuu
You know why you remind me of a calculator? Because 1+1 equals the two of us.
My therapist told me to write letters to the people you hate and then burn them.
I did that, but now I don't know what to do with the letters.
Why do men find it so difficult to solve puzzles after taking Viagra?
Because they just keep getting harder and harder!
What do 15-year-old boys and washing machines have in common?
They both like keeping one sock for themselves.
How do you know if you’ve walked into a sex addicts' counselling session?
The psychologist will thank you for coming.
Did you hear about the roofer who went to the doctor? He had shingles.
When does Friday come before Thursday?
In the dictionary.
What did the tree say when spring finally arrived?
"What a re-leaf."
Did you hear about the guy who was afraid of hurdles? He got over it.
Why did the drum go to bed? It was beat.
Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.
Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's at the hospital waiting to be seen.
Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it's a sourpuss.