Short jokes

Kobe never missed a shot, but he missed the helipad.

I'm going to hell!

I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."

Is your mom a virgin?

Mine is.

How am I alive?

You tell me.

If someone is mean to an orphan just say, "I will call your mum," and make them cry even more.

What did the mother cheetah say to her cub?

"Go to bed or I'll slap your spots off you!"

If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"

Tell someone to spell "Icup."

Answer: It will say, "I see you pee!"

I cry when you leave the room. They're tears of joy because you have an ugly hairline.

I tried to name my grass "emo" so it will cut itself.

So an orphan played for a football team, and the coach said, "Your parents must be proud of you!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war?

Because they were just roman around.

This joke is so funny, I'll bet you greened (grinned).

When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.

When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.

Zion's so fat, when he walks, he breaks his mama's back.

Zion is so big, when he walks it's an earthquake.

Canada United States Mexico

C U M

What do you call a girl above age 16 who says she is a virgin? A liar.

A Texan and an Alaskan walk in a room. The Alaskan says, "My state is bigger than yours." The Texan says, "It won't be when it melts!"

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?

Kids won't eat the broccoli.

My BALLS itched when I crashed the plane.