Short jokes
I don't understand why people hide under their blankets. It's not like the killer's gonna be like, "I'm gonna kill-....ahh man he's under his blanket."
What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.
"Korn Kob Kyle??? You know what this means!"
yikes...
#PlugWalk
qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm!
What does Christian say when he wants out of jail?
"Bale me out!"
Your dick is like a shotgun, one cock and you're ready to fire.
Wanna hear a joke about measurement... never mind, it would take too long.
A boy walks into some woods with a phone, and his friend comes by and asks, "What are you doing?"
He pauses, then says, "Trying some bird calls!"
What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?
"Use the horse!"
Your mama is so stupid that when she heard drinks were on the house, she grabbed a ladder.
If you are on here, don’t hate. There will be rude ones, but it doesn’t matter.
Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.
When did I wake up?
At the quack of dawn!
Have you heard the gossip about the butter? Oh, I guess I better not spread it.
What's the fastest way to Shepherd's Bush?
Up Shepherd's leg.
What do inner city schools and databases have in common?
Their problems are usually caused by a race condition.
I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm. She said, "Is it because I warned him when hotness came?" I said, "No, you don’t shut up!"
I wondered why the pitcher hadn’t pitched the ball yet.
Then it hit me.
What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?
A meringue-atang.
The wedding was so emotional, even the cake was in tiers.