What does LMAO mean?
Launching missiles at orphanage.
Short Jokes
In America, you catch Pikachu. In Soviet Russia, Pikachu catches you.
I'ma tell these to my adopted sister.
I kicked a goose, and I liked it!
I blend children to make a good living.
Women: Can I have your number?
Jesus: No.
Women: Why? Are you scared?
Jesus: No. Just when you wanna talk, just pray.
Why do women have no need for umbrellas? Because it doesn't rain in the kitchen.
I once told a blind orphan, "Hey, look at the bright side!"
Imagine when you are about to cry at the funeral, then your friend's phone rings.
Then he says, "I'll call you back, I'm still at the die."
I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu.
The pilot that hit the Pentagon must suck at sex because he missed the hole.
Did you hear about the Chinese student?
Me neither.
Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.
Why are there not that many phones in China? Because there’s too much Wing and Wong, so they will "wing" the wrong number.
I just wanted to write something random.
And now my wife is dead.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a baseball field?
One has a home.
I got my sister a book and she cried there, but I forgot she was blind.
Mom: Remember, you can tell me anything.
Abbie: I had sex with dad.
Mom: Go die in a hole!
You're so dumb that every time you use the bathroom, you use your shoe to wipe your ass.
What is a nonce's favorite toy...? You.
