Short jokes

Short jokes

Bed

She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed!

Orphan

What is the difference between an American and an orphan?

They don't have a home to get their guns.

Sh

Someone: Stop making jokes about sh!

Me: Oh, sorry man, I'll cut it out, I'll cut it out deep!

Mama

Your mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.

Religion

A Christian, a Jew, and a Catholic walk into a bar. The Christian says, “Where’s Mohammed?”

Mom

Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?

Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.

Nun

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"

Rape

About to go on a date.

But she was late.

So I got some tape.

And eventually punished her with rape.

Japan

Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?

Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.

Difference

What's the difference between Kobe Bryant and Jeffrey Epstein?

Only 2 13-year-olds went down on Kobe's helicopter.

Face

Roses are red, violets are blue.

My heart is dead because of you.

Actually, not because of you... because of your face.