Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
Short Jokes
Damn boy, you must be Nick Cannon because you don’t know when or how to stop.
Why did the rapper carry an UMBRELLA?
Because he heard there was a 50% chance of "Lil Wayne."
What does weed and the Carolina Panthers have in common?
They both get smoked in bowls.
Why did the rapper go to the auto shop?
To get his RHYMES in TUNE.
We shouldn't call gay guys "fucking cunts" because they aren't fucking cunts, they're fucking assholes.
What does a dog do in a dresser?
It pants!
Who is the least young Dave?
Dave-on.
Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.
Why did Daveon decide to become a magician? Because he wanted to make his problems "Daveon" disappear.
I complained to my dad why he never took me to the zoo.
He said if they want you, they’ll come get you.
My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"
Don’t be racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.
BlessedBrian must have been born on April Fools’ Day... because he’s a joke every day of the year.
How do rappers stay cool in the studio?
They turn on the mic and DROP THE HEAT!
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the concert?
Because his lyrics were so fire, he needed protection!
Why did the rapper go to the optometrist?
Because he needed to improve his RAP VISION.
I arrived at a restaurant early and the manager said, "Do you mind waiting a bit?" I said, "I don’t mind," and he said, "OK. Take these trays to table 9."
"Mhm... So you're gay?" -Darling
Is someone who is tardy again actually "retardy"?
