Short jokes
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
Why did the steward not receive his passport? Because his face was not valid!
Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart.
I made sure it didn't outsmart me.
I have so many cash machine jokes.
But none of them seem to work ATM.
Why don't Jedi like their female relatives?
Because they are Sith-ters.
"I only eat food on the right of my plate."
"Are you good at eating?"
"I'm alright at eating."
Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.
I love stairs. They always bring me up.
Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."
Imagine. Kobe could not.
Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?
I told him to be a stand-up comedian!
My older sister said she was gonna shoot herself, so I did it for her.
If Kobe missed a shot, his helicopter will too.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
I don't like Twin Tower jokes. They always tend to crash and burn.
What do teachers eat? They eat square stuff.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Twins.
Twins who?
Twins go boom boom today on 9/11.
#RIPBOZO
Your mum is so fat, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
The four Daisies:
Princess Daisy
Daisy Duck
Daisy Wells
Daisy Dove Bloom