Short jokes

Short jokes

Minecraft

Why doesn't Newton cut trees in vanilla Minecraft? Because he wants Minecraft to be realistic!

Scam

Bro, please block Kimberly Jones. She keeps trying to scam people.

Pinocchio

What did the lady say when she sat on Pinocchio's face:

"Tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth!"

Hairline

Your hairline is so far back, it makes the Giant from Clash of Clans jealous!

Child

Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?

Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.

Kid

Why don’t I shut myself all the time?

I can only fit so many pairs of kids in my mouth and stomach at the same time.

Orphan

Why are orphans bad at basketball?

Because no one is there for them to pass [the ball].

Company

The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!

Momma

Your momma so fat when she stepped on one scale, it broke. When she got another one, it said "TBC." She looked in the mirror, it broke.

Death

Did you know that Stephen Hawking's death was an accident because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep mode?"

Emo

Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?

A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.

Meme

What did MLK Jr. say when he spent the night on the internet?

"Last night I had a meme."