Short jokes

Short jokes

Pizza

What's the difference between a pizza and a guy you really hate?

One won't scream when you remove their meat.

Tuna

Did you hear about the nasty tuna fish?

He was rotten to the albacore.

Orphan

Orphans would be upset if they went to FamilyMart.

'Cause they sell oden, not a family.

Friend

My friend is so short, whenever I dance with her, it’s like dancing with a golf tee.

Pig

What do you call a stabbed pig?

Porkchopped.

What is a pig's favorite Food Network channel?

Pork Chopped!

Hah, got 'em (I guess)!

Cheek

She does not wanna fuck you, and she don’t need you clapping them cheeks.

Cat

While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5 min later I found it fell in the gutter.

Banana Peel

Be grateful:

You're missing work today because in the past, someone cared enough to leave that banana peel on the stairs.

Similarity

What's a similarity between Harvey Weinstein's pants and American bombs?

They both drop unannounced and leave mass casualties.

Doctor

What did the doctor say to the mother after delivering the baby? Sorry.

Tree

What was the oak tree's response to the apple tree's joke?

You should leaf it alone!

Pain

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!