Short jokes
Why is no one friends with Dracula? Because he's a pain in the neck.
The Twin Towers were like a woman stuck in the washer machine. They both got freed.
A family put their kid and their dog in an orphanage but came back for only the dog.
Why do shows have a family? Because they are "Pair-rents"!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Why was the orphan so successful?
When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
What film do orphans hate?
"Instant Family."
For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.
What’s black and long?
The Chick-fil-A line.
What did the coal say to the charcoal?
You look pretty coal! 🤣
Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?
A: Because knives don't have barrels.
Q: What do you call a gay cowboy?
A: A jolly rancher.
Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?
A: All the good guys are hung.
Dad: Want to go to the park, kid?
Kid: Sure.
Dad: Come on.
Kid: Why are we at the orphanage?
Dad: Go in.
"Hold my beer, watch this."
I know you came here to feel good about yourself...
If I fuck you harder, you have to scream "daddy," but what happens when you cum?
Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.
And that's what made him go down in history.
Me: What’s the definition of “ignorance”?
Friend: Don’t know?
Me: U STUPID!