Short jokes
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Any 8 year old: Sus!
Me: Jake, we're at a funeral!
Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.
If you look up the word "wheelchair" in a dictionary, you will see a picture of Stephen Hawking.
It puts a whole new spin on meals on wheels. No pun intended.
Oh, ate the cheese? Urmom.
Anthony Blinken's life sucks, and getting COVID-19 positive is the only positive thing that ever happened in his entire life!
Q. What is Terri Schiavo's favorite Eminem song?
A. "Till I Collapse."
What do you call a questioning Constanta?
Curious George.
What do skeletons do with their organs?
They organize them!
This is not really a joke, but it's a question.
If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?
Do you know why boys can't ask girls out? Because they don't have any balls to ask girls out!
What's the same with your dad and Retail Row?
They are both off the map.
What does an orphan and a dog have in common?
Both got taken from their parents.
I caught my wife cheating on me.
I beat my son and grounded him.
Rat
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually came back.
"Confucius say, man who has mosquito on balls truly understands nonviolence."
Why couldn't the surfer hang 10?
Because he forgot his feats!
Q: Why is it good being an orphan?
A: Because the family sized bag is all there's.