Short jokes
What do phones and orphans have in common?
They selfie! (It's because they don't have parents.)
Little Mickel was on a tree.
He fell down and hurt his knee.
He sat down and started to cry, and from there, he would never lie.
Your mama so fat she sunk the HMS ship!
Jokes are like food.
Not everyone gets it.
How did Gertie Gorilla make the Playboy magazine?
She was ape-ril!
Gallons (DYM 113).
Who is the gorilla's favorite president of the most recent years? It's Hairy Truman.
Why can orphans not get married?
They are dad can't walk them down the aisle!
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."
What do you do when you finish a magazine in school?
Answer: You shoot it!
Q: What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said to Courtney Love before he died?
A: “Holes gonna be big.”
My mates threw nuts at the wall, now we call them walnuts.
Hahaha :)
Q: What do you get when the cow jumped over the barbed wire? A: Udder destruction!
Me: Hey, are your parents here?
Orphan: (crying) STOP CALLING HERE!
What is the difference between a priest and anesthesia?
The anesthesia takes a while to put you under.
Why does the pancake team in baseball always win? Because they have the best batter.
Ahaha, I'm laughing because my friend is so black his mama killed the clown.
How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?
They slash them.
I wrote a joke on MH370... but I don’t know where it went.
When you are eating delicious street food in China and you ask the chef: You: "Is this chicken?" Chef: "No, its meow meow."