Short jokes
So, little Johnny is walking down the street and asks a stranger, "Sir, what are hormones?"
Then the man replies, "The moans of a fucking whore!"
Vape company: Hey, want some lung cancer and a nicotine addiction?
Teens: NO WAY!
Vape company: But it’s mango flavored!
Teens: O OK. 😤
You're so skinny that when you're driving, you have to put the seat forward to reach the pedals. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
When I was 17, my mom’s door was always locked. I wonder what she was doing.
Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?
Draggin' these balls across your face.
So, in "Revenge of the Sixth" when Anakin goes and kills the younglings, I thought to myself, "Hey, it’s just another day in an American school."
What did the fish say when seeing his best mate?
"I sea him!"
What do you call a cow's facial hair?
A moostache.
When someone said to an orphan, "My boyfriend ghosted me," the orphan says back, "Don't worry, my parents ghosted me!" 🤣
"Dude come here and see a rabbit!"
"Ok!"
"Are you ok, man?"
"Yeah, I’m fine."
"Dude, pull your pants back up!"
For being a big company, NASA is openly saying they want pictures of Uranus.
A kid goes into a restaurant without parents, and a waitress came up and said, "You have to leave; this is a family restaurant."
What did the girl with no hands get for her birthday?...
We don't know; she hasn't opened it yet.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Because walls.
The view is so much better without those twins covering the city.
Well, that was a blow up!
What's the difference between an orphan and a baby?
The orphan gets back up.
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.
Have you ever been to the new Disney park called SawCon?
SawCon deez nutz!
Did y'all ever hear about the great thunder crash of September 11th?