Short jokes

Short jokes

Rape

My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?

Rip

What does RIP stand for on Maddie's head stone?

Raped in Portugal!

Kid

What's an autistic kid's favorite transformer?

Autistemist Prime.

Kilometer

I sexually identify as kilometers per second.

Cuz I really wanna km/s (kill myself).

Orphan

Why don’t orphans understand the meaning of a family reunion?

Because they’re not wanted, yet maybe they should rob a 🏦 bank ;)

Woman

What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?

The tornado siren doesn't get raped.

Friend

I had a friend who got shot in the head.

Guess you could say he was...

Blown Away!

Marijuana

Why did the researchers want all the shore birds high on marijuana?

They wanted to leave no tern unstoned.

Abuse

Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.

Hairline

When someone calls you gay, say:

"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"