Short jokes

Short jokes

Swimsuit

Papyrus: Nyhe heh heh! I got a swim suit! And it even says cool dude!

Sans: I guess now it says pool dude ;)

Papyrus: SSSSAAAAANNNNSSSS!

Roast

Roses are red, violets are blue, when The Oh Hellos saw you they said "Shoo!"

Church

I love going to church to get closer to God, but my least favorite part of church has to be touching the priest’s penis.

Suicide

What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?

The school shooter will always spare you.

Brothel

What do KFC and a brothel have in common?

They’re both full of greasy chicks.

Tongue

My grandfather lost his tongue during WW2.

He never talks about it.

Teenager

When your teenager asks for personal space and you remind her that she came out of your personal space.

Clock

How did the digital clock show off to its mother?

Look, Ma, no hands!

Depression

How to get rid of your depression:

1. Stop self-pitying.

2. Realize you can't.

3. Fucking deal with it.

You're welcome.