Short jokes
Why isn't there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?
"Want to see if it fits?"
Haters are hating. I'm still alluring, but I couldn't give a fuck cus this site is dying and boring.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
My doctor asked my brother if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness.
He replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it!"
What's the rarest gun you can find in Africa? A water gun.
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.
Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
Why did the cellphone get glasses? Because it lost its contacts!
What do you call a German that can not see?
A Not-see.
Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga.
And 100% of men don’t care.
Why do people who get shot in the head always become therapists?
They are more open-minded.
NASA called me and they said they reached your hairline.
I wish death was in the form of a woman.
That way, it would never come for me.
Why are gay dudes so rude?
Because they're fucking assholes.
What kind of animal makes a good bottle opener?
A male Duck on Viagra.
How does a woman scare a gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist.
I feel bad for all American Clash Royale players.
They always start with two towers downed.