Short jokes

Short jokes

Your sister is so stupid, when she saw Mountain Dew, she went to the top of a mountain to get it.

My mom loves balls.

But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.

I'm black, and I have a dying family in my basement that hasn't eaten in 2 weeks. They need help.

Btw, it's a joke lol.

What caused Captain Hook's death?

He accidentally used the wrong hand to wipe his ass.

A blind woman told me I had a big penis yesterday.

I think she was pulling my leg.

She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.

COP: Are you high?

ME: If I was high, could I do this? *walks in a perfectly straight line*

COP: Wth he just walked off a cliff.

Boss: You're fired.

Me: *turns in my gun and my badge*

Boss: You're a waiter. Where did you get those?

Robin Hood [hands over stolen fortune]: here you are, my poor friend.

Friend: Wow thanks, I'm rich!

Robin [narrows eyes]: You're what?

Are you free tomorrow?

No, I’m expensive, sorry. 💵💸