Short jokes
What type of people have the world record for most stories read in the shortest amount of time?
Emos, some of them are still in the air.
Your dad went on America's Got Talent for "smoothest way to leave their child."
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Tea-hee-hee!
Your mum eats cabbage.
Orphan: Can I go outside?
Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.
Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW
"Stand up for yourself! Oh, come on, walk it off."
What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?
They're both full of child groomers.
"Ching Chong ling long suck my ding dong."
My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.
She said help, so I kicked her.
Like it if you judge people's hairlines.
What's the difference between economy and Vietnamese?
Economy doesn't work.
I found this game, it's like flappy bird: https://terrorist.group/
If you have a pair and it runs around the street, what do you call it? A running pair.
What's an emo's favorite food?
Shot gun ammo.
Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day."
Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"
I wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself.
What’s the difference between Hitler and a bug?
Nothing.
Random: What are your hobbies?
Me: Bullying kids in WhatsApp groups 💀
Why do gay people like sports?
Because they get to play with balls.
Everyone: "Look, it's Superman!"
Me: "No, it's an emo."
Everyone: "Oh."