Short jokes
You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."
You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.
You're so bald, the Hair Club for Men has elected you president.
You're so bald, I rub your head to see into the future.
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like roll-on deodorant!
You're so bald, I can see what's on your mind.
Why are bald people very easily manipulated by a shower?
Because when they take a bath, they get brainwashed!
A father came to his daughter's 18th birthday. He finally came.
Why are orphans good at dodge ball?
No one misses them.
What do you call a female Michael Jackson? She she.
POV: Her name is Alli.
What's an orphan's favorite flower?
A self-raising flower.
Hey, Patrick, what am I??
Uh, stupid?
No, I’m Texas!
What’s the difference??
😂😂😂😂
Texas is such a shitty state. There’s a reason it only has one star.
Most people call it grave robbing...
I prefer to call it cryptocurrency.
What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?
One is wanted and one's not.
Your hairline is so deep people can see what you're thinking.
What's the difference between a pregnant girl and a light bulb?
... You can unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a pregnant girl.
Joe mama's so fat, her belly button gets home an hour before she does.
Spell "I cup."