Short jokes
Why do mountains never rest?
Because it’s ever-est.
Why did the doctor tell the man to go for a mountain walk?
Alps clear the mind! Haha.
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
Why is England's team unfair in chess?
Because 2 rooks = 10 and a queen = 9.
You know what I told my little brother plane?
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and driver's education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
What do you call a nosy Mexican?
That's nacho business.
What kind of Panera Bread do pencils use?
Panera Lead.
What do you call a Panera Bread marking a test?
A Panera grade.
What is the name of Hitler's WiFi?
The local Aryan network.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common.
My sister's tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
What does Michael say when he laughs? He he.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
Q: What do you get when you cross Viagra and Donald Trump?
A: Erection fraud. (Just a joke.)
The short kid came earlier than I thought. Guess he came with such short notice.
Putting WiFi in the morgue to enable live streaming.
Why do orphans always come back?
Because I love cock.
How do you get Carrie Underwood to dehydrate fast?
Tell her that all the water supplies contain the COVID vaccine.