Short jokes
Normal Europe: Oh no, I lost my iPhone!
Amish: Oh no, I lost my potato!
What's a pig's favorite ballet?
Swine Lake.
If Silver Surfer and Iron Man teamed up, they would be great ALLOYS!
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!
Face-Timing My Girlfriend:
"Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick!" *shows muscle*
Opponent fist attacks your face, no you can not activate a trap card.
Jake Paul
"You're the bomb"—a compliment in the USA.
An argument in the Middle East.
Hillary Clinton
Why did 1 break the door open? Because 2, 3, 4.
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it's a piñata... BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
Man in boxers leads policeman on brief chase.
Kids?
What’s green and has wheels?
Grass, I lied about the wheels.
If Stephen Hawking was an Xbox... he just red ringed and rose up to GameStop.
Why do Asians don’t wear contacts? Cause they can’t fitt.
Trump.
Yo mama's so stupid, she had a staring contest with a mirror.
I’ve two dogs and two cats, and they are all Democrats. They want a handout everyday.
I’d tell a sodium and hydrogen pun, but NaH.