Short jokes
My friend had a drink called Quick Start, so I said, "That's a quick start to the morning!"
What do a "transgender" woman's favorite song and his/her last online order have in common?
~they're both a dick in a box.
How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.
The reason he died is that they accidentally flipped the wrong light switch.
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
There are more than 2 genders.
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
For his sake, I hope that heaven is wheelchair accessible...
What do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag?
A Twix.
You do not spell "computer" like this; you spell it like this: "cumputer."
If babies stay in their mothers for 9 months, are they not 9 months old when they are born?
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender said, "Why the long face?"
One day Johnae said, "What do you call a family outing?"
"Incest."
Low key Johnae fucks Kirby and Peach.
Why don't we wrestle bears?
The pain is un-bearable.
Someone was crushing a bag of chips. I said, "Are you making edibles?"
Why are Mexicans so bad in the Olympics?
Because all the ones that can run, jump, and swim live in America.
Zaine Davis and Stephen Hawking fuck each others brains out.
Yesterday I was fucking my sister, and she said, "You fuck a lot like dad." I said, "Really? Mum said that too."
I went into a dark basement with a flashlight, but then it died, but I was not scared. I was actually delighted.