Short jokes
I gotta song for Hawaii, baby, you light up my world like nobody else.
What is 6 inches long and makes women scream? Stillbirth...
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone unplugged the router.
What is blue and sits in a corner? A baby in a baggy.
What do you call a Mexican midget?
A paragraph, because he's not a full essay.
What grade does Sherlock hit on girls from?
Elementary, my dear Watson!
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her?
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too.
What do you say to toast with bad shoes?
"Butter those."
Why are retards good at basketball?
'Cause they dribble all the time!
How do Chinese people name their children?
They throw pots and pans down the stairs and listen for the sounds, "Ching Chong Chang."
Why did Mary fall off the swings?
She got hit by a refrigerator.
It's not my fault my cousin's hot ;) YEE YEE
I have two heads, four eyes, and six ears, what am I?
Ugly.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost WiFi connection.
Three guys walk into a bar; the fourth one ducks.
Stephen Hawking's death was simply an accident. He pressed power off instead of sleep mode.
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow cases? They've been making headlines.
Why doesn't Santa have kids? Because he only comes once a year.
Psyonix's OCE servers.