Short jokes
What's the difference between a plane and a woman?
At least the plane doesn't give you herpes when it crashes at your place.
What’s the hardest part about f...ing toddlers?
My boner.
Sixteen Sodium particles walk into a bar, followed by Batman.
Why can't orphans play catch?
Because they don't have parents to catch the ball.
Where does Stephen Hawking go when he breaks his arm? PC World.
A knife is like hallucinations, both in your head.
Q: What's the difference between me and cancer?
A: My dad didn't beat cancer...
My gun is like my house, used to be full, now it's empty.
My neighbor is like my marriage. They're both in the hole.
Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.
I can tell you an airplane joke, but it will probably fly over your head.
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
Hippity hoppity, Hiroshima, Nagasaki.
Did Jesus die a virgin?
Of course not, he got nailed before he died!
Why did the penguin pull out a tooth? It was Mexican.
Once, I ate a skunk. It was hard because I didn't get it down the whole way.
Ghanshyam.
What do you call a bunch of Aboriginals rolling down a hill?
Abo-lanche.
Ariana Grande
Lachlan