Short jokes

Short Jokes

Girl

How did the blind girl get a date?

She said it was love at first sight.

Eye

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you haven't told her twice.

Steven Hawking

Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?

Mother: He died.

Daughter: How did he die?

Mother: He never got recharged.

  • 2
  • Name

    My sister's name was Philma. We were unfortunate enough to have the last name Coochie. Let's just say no more virgins were at that school.

  • 1
  • Vegetable

    The lettuce and tomato were in a race. The lettuce was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.

    Beetle

    A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to another beetle, "Is this stool taken?"

    Mum

    Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?

    Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.

    Cow

    What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?

    High steaks gambling.

  • 1
  • Pedophile

    What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?

    They both lay pipes in public parks.

  • 0
  • Classroom

    So three retards walk into a classroom...

    Sike, it was the garbage. They mistook it for their classroom.

  • 5
  • Girl

    A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.

    Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"