Short jokes
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
A baby seal walks into a club...
Spell IHOP, now say 'ness' at the end... 😂 ...I ate your penis!
I work at a tire shop.
I'm pretty tired.
Why do emo people want to be called scene now? The only thing I've seen from them is their suicide rate climbing.
Have you ever heard Stephen Hawking sing?
"Head, shoulders, wheels and frames, wheels and frames!"
What is a cow's favorite dance move?
The milkshake.
Everything disappears in the Bermuda Triangle.
Except my depression.
Make a wish kid: I want to meet Mac Miller.
Make a wish staff: You will soon, chief.
Cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already at stage four!
There was a chicken sitting on the bench. Then came another one. Then there were two.
How did the retard win the break dancing competition?
He saw flashing lights.
I'm going to your mom's house. Can you help me, planet?
NONCE
I'm like a broken refrigerator, cool but broken inside.
Your Fortnite win rate.
Rainbows top the class, as they always score with flying colors.
People who make puns always get pun-ched by people.
People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse.
They can stay in their living room.
My wiener's small.