Short jokes
Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry.
I tried making an orphan baseball team. It sucked because they couldn’t find home plate.
What do you play Fallout 4 with low health?
You Fallout.
Me: It smells like good fam.
Friend: What's good fam?
Me: Nothing much, what about you fam?
How did the skeleton know it was about to rain?
"Because he felt it in his bones?"
No,
He read the weather app, you idiot.
There was a kidnapping at school.
Don't worry, he woke up.
Fanta Klare Zitrone is cool.
What's the difference between a rock and a dead baby?
You can't fuck a rock.
My sister argued with me that you can't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face when I drove pasta!
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints.
What's the city with the fastest growing population?
Ireland, cuz it's Dublin everyday!
Why does Kurt Cobain hate his brother?
Because he's always calling shotgun.
I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?
Kurt Cobain's microphone.
What's better than throwing dead babes?
Catching them after with a pitchfork.
6jhyrgeda.
What’s the difference between a mother and a fetus at an abortion office?
Only one of them is scared.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wakanda? Wakanda who? WAKANDA ENDING IS THIS?
What do you call sex?
Making cake.
My boyfriend is just like a sexy nerd and I still have to ask him things like that because I'm so distracted from him.
Alright, my sister is ALWAYS dancing randomly all the time, and what I say is, "Go get you boyfriend, dude!"