Short jokes
Is your body from McDonald's, because I'm loving it?
What do you call a no "r"-med T-rex?
A T-ex.
Yaxaas?
What do you call a dictionary on drugs?
High definition or addictionary.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No-eye-deer (no idea).
If you have 20 apples and you ate 2, how many do you have left?
0 because you have 20 and take away 2, you have 0 left.
You know, eBay sucks. I was looking for a lighter, and it gave me 18,906 matches.
There was a dino at the library today.
It was reading a thesaurus.
Your mamma's so fat, the aliens call her their mother ship!
Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.
No, what did you get? Older.
I like my women like I like my diving pool:
Deep and wet.
"SpaStics on aplastic. Add me on ps4 SpaZZagaZZa54."
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
Why did the person peel his skin off? Because he wanted to.
What did the 90s rocker Space Engineer in multiplayer Miner yell at the Troll stealing his stuff?
"Hey! give me my Nickelback!"
The wedding was so emotional, even the cake was in tiers.
An assassin is about to shoot his target, "I'm about to give you the JFK experience."
I went to the store, and yeah...
Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?
What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?
A meringue-atang.